[Alan is having his disturbing recurring daydream of himself as a male stripper]. You might want to read your Daily Express. This book would fit ideally into, er, an attache case or the thigh pocket of a pair of fashionable combat trousers. On age difference being nothing but a number: "Im 47. Alan Partridge: That's one way of looking at it, another way of looking at it is, people like them, let's make some more of them. I'm Alan Partridge is a 1997 BBC situation comedy starring Steve Coogan and written by Coogan, Peter Baynham and Armando Iannucci. Alan Partridge: Uh, have a go on the loo? Bookmark. I've had one panic attack in a car wash. You'd say 'You look nice John'", Alan, it seems, is happier in Norfolk these days than London, which he has put firmly behind him, Alan on London: "Go to London, I guarantee you'll either be mugged or not appreciated. It would burst wouldn't it? Alan Partridge: [sniffing it] It's quite nice. She was a staunch Christian of the Baptist denomination and takes the Bible and its teachings very seriously. . Even then it's going to weigh the best part of a ton. Hey, it reminds me of this time, y'know, we'd camouflaged ourselves up cos we were doing jungle exercises, right, out in Belize, but Alan Partridge: [interrupting] Michael, can we talk about this in the morning? I say, 'Right. Alan Partridge: I used to think "Ooohh she's nicer than my wife.". 24. Michael: Aye. Aqua. Tony Hayers: [laughing and shaking his head] No, no, it's a bad idea. - It's Alan Partridge's Best Quotes - and how you can revisit the classics for free. You may or may not want to deploy these in real life. Alan Partridge: Yes, please. Then one day, two big guys are driving. In 1974 I was catching the London train from Crewe station. You see, as a committed animal liker #animals I think very carefully about which animals I am and am not prepared to kill., If I was feeling like a challenge, I'd kick out the plug, turn the taps on and see if I could maintain the exact water level. I was trying to pay you a compliment, unless I've grossly misread the situation. Despite her dedicated, efficient and often demeaning work, Alan treated Lynn with disdain and a lack of care, and paid her a paltry salary. I am 47 years old; my girlfriend is 33 years old. Maybe I want to mix them up, but I want it to be my decision. 2. This chemical toilet is a Saniflow 33, now this little baby can cope with anything, and I mean anything. Alan Partridge: Hm. Uphill runs become power sappingly mundane whilst overtaking National Express coaches becomes a long, drawn-out affair. Alan Partridge: See, you did it again! Straight away you've got them by the jaffas.. But for the time being at least they have each other. Alan Partridge: [quietly] Thank you. In a list drawn up by the British Film Institute in 2000, voted by industry professionals, I'm Alan Partridge was named the 38th best British television series of all time. Partridge only draws his words of wisdom from the best sources. 5. We're not straying from spoilers in here. Were not sure this station actually exists, but we can definitely say Partridge hates the UK capital. Great joke between Partridge and his friend Dan. Mind you, I have been here ten weeks. Throughout the questions I will be remaining impartial at all times. Not that you'd find these ladies at a bingo hall, of course they're altogether a higher class of fat lady. But, yeah, I used to dream that one day I'd drive a brand-new Range Rover towing a speed boat. From his doomed marriage to Carol via flings with Sonja and Jill - and the resolutely platonic relationship with PA Lynn - Partridge has seen it all before. A tough guy! It's a lovely car. Jill: "I don't recall saying that." My father died on 15 February, and has now been buried. No, if it was you could add a zero to that. It's going to be terrible and I need to see it immediately. Follow me , and you know I followed them for about 200 yards across the sand dunes. Urrgh. No one had heard of Oxford before Inspector Morse. Partridges addiction to chocolate takes a disturbing turn. Michael: Aye. Da, da, da, da, da, der. Which actually improves . You like to stick to your own. "[My assistant]" Whether quoting bits of Casualty as medical advice after Alan pierces his foot on a spike, sourcing the Toffos as Alan delivers a careers talk, or taking on tax inspectors after her bosss fraudulent claim on a ticket to see Shrek, shes always there to help when she can. On cautiously expressing affection: "I love you in a way. Enjoy it. Y'know, vandals, y'know? Jill smiles at him], [Alan is on a date with Jill at an owl sanctuary]. Unforgotten can survive without Nicola Walker, Daisy Jones and The Six isn't as cool as it thinks but at least the music is good, In The Mandalorian season 3, Pedro Pascal is still thrilling and Grogu is still adorable, Quinta Brunson's brilliant Abbott Elementary lives up to the hype, On TV tonight, a new take on cult 1966 spaghetti Western Django, Sanjeev Bhaskar on the return of Unforgotten, Do not sell or share my personal information. "I'm Alan Partridge Quotes." Login . Alan Partridge : I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro. high school Cook a cat! I love this house. I confused the boys. Alan Partridge: You sound like a James Bond villian. 27. Oh, very busy. Have something to add to this story? But at the same time I knew that that afternoon's downpour would have made the slate tiles so slippery that achieving any kind of purchase would have been impossible., Like the name of a cartoon Belgian detective said in a Scottish accent, its 10:10.11 It, gingerly. Alan Partridge: Because because you do this all the time. But I suppose shes a bit like Burt Reynolds. And the bad news?Lynn Benfield: The accountants say that since you . He said, "You jammy bastard" and quick as a flash, I replied, "Don't be blue, Peter!" Look at me. Alan Partridge: Ah-haaaaa! Yes, bacon ten out of ten, button mushrooms bingo, black pudding snap, uh, minor criticism, more distance between eggs and beans. mccartney wings Enjoy it. [He turns to another page] OK, right. Share on Facebook (opens in a new window), Share on Flipboard (opens in a new window). Sorry, sometimes it's difficult to understand the Geordie people. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Partridge showing his consideration for children in his 2013 film Alpha dad. Tony Hayers: Alan, this is Peter Linehan, he's revamping our current affairs output. I would've taken it off sooner but I was having a fascinating conversation with the proud father of Norfolk's most sun-tanned child. Jason: [putting a party hat on Alan's head] Wahey! He also thinks Wings was Paul McCartneys best band. Alan Partridge: If you think you can upstage Jill by wearing that you're very much mistaken. Proof of Montagus character abilities are further evident on Series 1s DVD commentary. Alan: "Thanks a lot! Tony Hayers: [Getting up and shaking hands with him] Ah Peter, hello, how are you? Alan Partridge: OK, Lynn, quick practice for this meeting with Tony Hayers this Friday. Alan Partridge: [raising his wine glass] Here's to our future relationship at the BBC. [Taken aback, Lynn looks uncomfortable and doesn't say anything]Alan Partridge: I'm being bawdy, Lynn. Alan Partridge: I prefer to go alone. Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge, Alan Partridge: Welcome to the Places of My Life, https://en.wikiquote.org/w/index.php?title=Alan_Partridge&oldid=3171589, Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License. Have you watched these big hits on HBO Max, Disney+, Netflix, and more? Peter Linehan: We haven't met but I liked your chat show. A detective series based in Norwich called "Swallow". He comes out. Lynn: Good. . Fly over one of those boring families going on a cycling vacation. [Taken aback, Lynn looks uncomfortable and doesn't say anything]. Alan Partridge: [while having sex] Do you mind if I talk? ", 11. Alan Partridge: [forcing a smile] No, he won't give me one. Which is French for water. And there's a man there and he's Russian - he's got eyebrows, you know - and he's on the phone going, "What, a whole submarine? I am invited to be the first to throw earth into the grave. I've been working like a Japanese prisoner of war. Alan Partridge : They've rebadged it, you fool! [Alan shrugs wordlessly. About Warner Bros. Alan Partridge: You know, when I used to see you in reception, do you know what I used to think? Alan Partridge: [singing] Guaranteed to blow your mind! He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. On sex (again): "I'm going to hump ya, like Deputy Dawg would hump ya. Welcome March with discounts on gadgets for your home. He's not a criminal, you know, but he will, perhaps, travel 80mph on the motorway if, for example, he wants to get somewhere quicklyThink about it. By. Alan Partridge: Stand down, at ease you're not in the army anymore. Y'know, makes yeh wonder what it's all aboot. 18:00, 14 MAY 2021; . Y'know, a lot a' them's from broken hawmes. [Jill has just smeared Alan with chocolate mousse, there is a knock at the door. "Lynn, get rid of . The temperature inside that apple turnover is over 1,000 degrees. Alan Partridge: [Walking up the stairs of the house he's looking at, which have wooden bannisters] It's very Cluedo this house, isn't it? Goodreads helps you follow your favorite authors. Either way it's incest. Alan Partridge: Michael, release the headmaster! Charles and Camille. But theres no affection, maintains Alan. I'll be honest, I'm dead against it. But if I said I am now going to jump into a TARDIS, go back in time and recreate the Berlin Olympics with these three old women, you'd say "Alan, that is hot, we were wrong earlier.". Stop getting Bond wrong! An interesting take on an otherwise iconic song. With one hand braced against the wall, Im now grabbing and clawing at the angry aperture, slashing and scraping in a bid to ease the sensation. Before that he was Deputy Editor of Mashable UK in London. Now, first award tonight is for best Christ. I've locked you all in the boardroom so you don't get me. But then at the last minute Michael: He pulls a ripcord, right? Either way, one of us is falling apart. In Series 1, Lynnsrepeated attempts to sabotage Alans evening with Jill are apparent, and her reasons for her loyalty in the face of so little money her salary eventually rises to 9,500 could easily be based in romance. Knowing me, Alan Partridge, sacking you, Glenn Ponder. I love this house. My mother and father were having the row to end all rows. What does that say to you about regional detective series? [Lynn tries to speak] No! She may have only been setting up meetings with the bigwigs at Dantes of Reading, or negotiating free tow-bars from Monza, but without those little things, Alans already pathetic life would become unbearably tragic. [they lean in close to each other, face to face]. I wanted to see Roger Moore take on Fiona Fullerton. Alan: "Oh come on." Jill: "Yeah, alright then." 7. Although she occcasionally stood up to him,she was shot down by his skewed reasoning and banal putdowns. Stop! She's my PA. Hard-worker, but there's no affection. It should contain a torch, a CurlyWurly, a book of stamps, a free digital watch with denim strap, a vodka miniature, a Bic-style razor and a copy of the Daily Express. Thanks very much for the gearknob, and good night. ", 8. [Tony shakes his head again] 'Arm Wrestling with Chas and Dave'. 26. I have to say, Pat, kids dont make you happy. But, er, that's not going to happen. Lynn Benfield: Well, Alan, if you want a Rover 200 you're going to have to sack everyone at Pear Tree Productions. Alan Partridge: We take fat people from the inner cities, put them in big nappies, and then get them to throw each other out of a circle that we draw with chalk on the ground. Susan: Um, Alan, Did you send Sophie a Valentine's card this morning? Alan Partridge: Fire, fire, the fayre's on fire! [Alan makes a long, drawn-out leering noise and giggles. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. He's begging us, he's begging us man, 'No, please don't!' Have you had your breakfast this morning, Robert? He's going to die! My mother tuts and looks away., Wed love your help. 1 Mar. Share PINTEREST Email Print Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images By. 12. Certainly not 'Bravo Two Zero' by Andy McNabb. And then we cut to Moscow. Alan Partridge: Yeah, I know the feeling. Personal assistant Uphill races become commonplace, while overtaking National Express coaches becomes a long-term affair. Alan Partridge: Britain has some of the safest roads in Europe. Erm, drink it. Either that or their fingerprints, eh? Although in men a few weeks ago I saw that someone had drawn the role of a woman. Glanalangalangalangalangalang! You want some more glitter? They say it will help people in * wheelchairs *. Lynn Benfield The beginning of 'Alpha Papa' finds The Partridge in sweet motion at the wheel. And here are some of his most salient thoughts on cars 'Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa' is out on DVD and Blu-ray from Monday 2 December. ", 13. Alan Partridge: Yeah, it's vulcanised rubber, which means it won't perish. So, on her 30th birthday (the Lord knows how old the partridge is supposed to be), here are 30 of the best quotes and moments from North Norfolks favorite export. They look around and say, Were teaming up, this could be our mansion. Off to London, no doubt. Lynn Benfield: With a skeleton staff of two Alan Partridge: I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro, I'm not driving a Mini-Metro. Alan Partridge: Well, it wouldn't have been round. Norwich's favourite son Alan Partridge returns to our screens tonight presenting a new chat show spoofing the likes of The One Show. You wake up in the morning, you have to read all the Sunday papers, the kids are running around, you have to mow the lawn, wash the car and you say to yourself Sunday, damn Sunday!. Alan Partridge Quotes. tv shows Youth Hosteling with Chris Eubank. Not my words Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine! Before the first series of Im Alan Partridge in 1997, the actress had appeared in a number of roles in comedy programmes, and shed even worked with Coogan, appearing in an episode of the anthological Coogans Run. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last minute rush for the only seat remaining next to a tall, handsome man with long hair, it was the seventies; Buckaroo! Putting a damp spoon back in the bowl is the tea-drinking equivalent of sharing a needle. Alan Partridge: Pity, because they were very keen on that one. Hello, Tony. Alan Partridge: It flushed on the first yank! Alan Partridge: I had hopes and dreams. She's 14 years younger than me. I don't agree with that, but I don't like hairy women." Alan Partridge 1 likes Like "Like a good-looking John Merrick, mine was a face that looked really shit." Share it in the comments. Needless to say, I had the last laugh, now f*** off! Go on. Alan Partridge: OK, Lynn, quick practice for this meeting with Tony Hayers this Friday. Lynn Benfield: Well, Rawlinson's say you can have another fifty of the shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you plug them again tomorrow. long time ", 10. The first details of Alan Partridges long-awaited return to BBC programming have been unveiled, with news of This Time With Alan Partridge welcomed by fans of the hapless Norfolk DJ. Be the first to learn about new releases! 30. [they smile coyly at each other. And so after a final flurry scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit I stop scratching. Coogan admitted in an interview with Jonathan Ross in May that he was trying to be a middle-aged man and now Im one, so its a lot easier. Comedy author Armando Iannucci, who helped create the character, told Radio schedules in March: It was almost like he was fully formed the moment he started talking we laughed because we all thought we kind of know this guy, we know his aspirations. Alan Partridge: No, that's a bit too far-fetched. Other names The greatest farmyard to table strategist of the last one hundred years. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Mind if I have a go? Da, da, da - and now a really big bounce right over and I land on my feet. Swallow is a detective who tackles vandalism. I don't agree with that, but I don't like hairy women., Like a good-looking John Merrick, mine was a face that looked really shit., Now, this is an uncomfortable thing to discuss, but I run towards discomfort like a man who has strapped truth explosives to his body and made his peace with God., As I write these words Im noisily chomping away on not one, but two Murray Mints. And instead, I have to watch a giant Michael Bolton lookalike, in a tight waistcoat, throw an oven over bales of hay. Pat Farrell: Penny for them. Alan Partridge: It's just a wet t-shirt competition, Lynn. I crouch down and, unsure of how much to put in (why dont they just tell you? Have I got a second series? Alan Partridge: Oh, I like this. Did you see that!? He runs up on to the garage roof. My girlfriend's 33. Sophie Rundle: Motherhood has made me too tired to people-please', When presenter Steve Allen left LBC and his statement following immediate exit, Date of Ken Bruce's final day on Radio 2 and why he's leaving for Greatest Hits early, The Witch Trials of JK Rowling makes sensible points. Cooking in prison. Thanks for signing up. Felicity Montagu is coming back to play the tormented character. Use a sausage as a breakwater. Not me Triumph Stag! He goes, 'No, no!' Like little tears, little wax tears dripping from your ears because they're sad. Too late Nobody does it half as good as you, baby you're the best! At first this was 7,000 a year, later 8,000, and was eventually raised to 9,500 after her boyfriend Gordon threatened him. Alan on Sundays: Sunday Bloody Sunday. Sure enough, I got into the spirit and played a practical joke on Gibson by getting my assistant to phone him during one of his shows to tell him his elderly mother had had a fall. The fiddling merely tantalises the itch, and it becomes more aggressive. Ugh. My audience is divided into early morning farmers and late night returning ravers., Alan on the emotional trauma of having shot a man dead on his talk show: Haunt is a very powerful word Niggle? So they ride the money, bang a few heads together. Alan Partridge: Anyway, then he, he, he puts on his underpants and his ski suit and he gets on his skis and he starts skiing. Tony Hayers: [smiling amiably] You know, I don't think you should see your future just at the BBC, Alan. john lennon On keeping personal and private lives separate: "Lynn's not my wife. But I peck, overall a very good effort, seven against ten. [Taken aback, Lynn looks uncomfortable and doesn't say anything]. And he goes, "I've got to go, love. They do say it'll help people in *wheeeelchairs*. ", 6. And he said, this is saaad, you want to upgrade. Tim loves music and travel But she also likes doing a good job: I think in her car outside she does a 'yes!' whenever. Alan Partridge: Thank you for being this morning's farmer. As far as I'm concerned, Neil Diamond will always be King of the Jews. Don't cry, ears, you're on the side of a lovely head! I'm not playing that again. Other great ideas Partridge had for television included Youth Hostelling with Chris Eubank, Inner-city Sumo and Monkey Tennis. When North Norfolk Digital was sent a box of heavy metal CDs,19 muggins here was about to open it when fellow DJ Rudy Gibson shouted over, Careful, Alan. Tony Hayers: There is to be no second series. Share; Comments; News. "Lynn, get rid of her. I'll tolerate one, but not both. Alan Partridge: Yeah, Michael, I was just saying to Susan, bit of a job for you, unfortunately some vandals have sworn all over my car again. In fact, it's happened, it's over, it's already happened, you are a sacked man. Tony Hayers: If you don't do it, Sky will. 3. I was just making a pun on your name. Alan Partridge: I'm being bawdy, Lynn. Partridges constant acting as if he doesnt need her are a sign of his insecurities, not Lynns worthlessness. A second series followed in 2002, with Partridge now living in a static caravan after recovering from a mental breakdown. 25 of the most textbook Alan Partridge quotes. Alan Partridge: I think he'll be a bit tougher than that, Lynn. . Michael: Aye. ", Alan responds to Irish history: If it was just the potatoes that were affected, at the end of the day you will pay the price if youre a fussy eater., Alan responds to being fired: Smell my cheese!, Alan on the Daily Mail: Its arguably the best newspaper in the world. It's all right. Our goofy radio host gives a unique introduction to the world of drug-based sex fetishes. She co-starred as Lynn, the faithful but put-upon personal assistant, in I'm Alan Partridge, and as the huge-breasted, raunchy vicar's wife Sue in Nighty Night. Two fat ladies, 88! Alan Partridge: Jill. Your programmes were appalling. Tony Hayers: It's not bollocks. Backfired. 8. Gladiators Jet to host a Millennium Barn Dance at Yeovil Airfield. Correctly watched. Lynn's in-character response is that the ratings for his show started badly and got worse. Alan Partridge: Well, then, you must be a full moon! It must not, I will not repeat it, turn into a nocturnal rave. Peter Linehan: Has he given you another series? I guarantee you'll either be mugged or not appreciated. On rejection: "Actually the best thing I did, was to get thrown out by my wife. Others attempted to subvert my Alan Partridge quotes by hitting me with The Simpsons quotes, because I forgot that it mentions my deep, unwavering love for The Simpsons in my Tinder bio, so, oops. Part of HuffPost Entertainment. I'll just speak over you. Blow 'im to bits. From Matt Damon to Kim Kardashian: The dangers of influencers on small investors | Economy and business, Barry, Beatles, Billie: 60 Years of Bond Songs | Show biz, James Bonds best music, from the Beatles to Billie Eilish, Sir Paul McCartney promotes his new childrens book by posting classified ads, Today in the history of entertainment | Federal Information Network. I'm Alan Partridge is a 1997 BBC situation comedy starring Steve Coogan and written by Coogan, Peter Baynham and Armando Iannucci. Alan Partridge: It's alright. ", 4. Back of the net!" 8. It's just, it's in my picture. Michael: [in his very broad Geordie accent] Aye-aye, Mr. Partridge! . sufferers about the condition. Would you like a second series of your chat show? This book is a top business aid. That was soft rock cocaine enthusiasts, Fleetwood Mac. I was gonna give out some some awards. Could go your way; could go mine. Obviously, Partridge is thrilled with the age gap between him and his girlfriend Sonja. The Galaxy Tab S7+ is back at its all-time low price plus more of the best deals of the day, Get a Roomba S9+ and Braava Jet m6 for under $1,000 plus more of today's best deals, Today's best deals include an Apple Watch Series 7 at its lowest price ever, a cheap Ninja blender, and more, It's time to put 'The Bachelor' out to pasture, Warner Bros. LIST: Some Of Alan Partridge's Mightiest Musings. It sums up the frustration of a Sunday, doesnt it? Everyone's here. By the time the giant hair dryer came on, I was in the footwell. You're sacked. OK, uh small-talk. It's embarrassing. Lynn Benfield: No, no, no, it's different. Alan Partridge: It's Valentine's Day today, and love is in the air? And then he peers down the periscope thing and looks through it and goes, "Oh my God. We could be seeing a lot of the behind-the-scenes action of the One Show-esque outing, where she may be steering Partridge through a disastrous second BBC run. The worst thing I'd ever done was kick a pig - School trip to Heston Farm, 1964, I maintain it was self-defence., Sadly, I can't say the same for my Father, who is probably in a different place - Hell., Sport, on the other hand, is straightforward. Do I look like I suffer from panic attacks? So, er, thanks. Topics. Mmm smells. . On keeping. Imagine two things that you like. Baby, you're the best. Not my words, Michael, the words of Shakin Stevens. So, er, thanks. Then the cups start wobbling and then a man who used to be in "The Onedin Line" comes in and goes, "Why are the cups wobbling? Lynn: Good. Actually, I took some notes. Would you say, bearing in mind he's depressed and has respiratory problems, would you say 'Go and take that blusher off you mis-shapened elephant tranny'? He puts some coins on the bedside cabinet]. I'm gonna have to tell some other Russians. [Alan is being shown around a new house] Estate Agent: Living room. You've been sacked. But first I'd take out the labs and then I'd type into the attack computer 'Mr Cragg, chemistry teacher'. Michael: Me, I'd, I-I-I'd have an, an Apache attack helicopter. 'Oh no! Michael: Right. And he turns round with his gun and then he does a backward somersault off this ramp, and he, he lands on his feet - I'm not sure why, but he's not showing off. Appearances 4. Go to London, and I guarantee you will be either assaulted or unappreciated. Take the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway. Discovery alleges that Paramount undercut their $500 million deal. You wake up in the morning, you've got to read all the Sunday papers, the kids are running round, you've got to mow the lawn, wash the car, and you think Sunday, bloody Sunday! I can read you like a book, and not a very good book. And I came to a startling but unshakeable conclusion: no genuinely good music has been created since 1988., The father, Trevor, was an asthmatic, but what he lacked in being able to breath quietly, he more than made up for with parental skills., Her yelling continues until I answer the door to find her on her knees shouting through the letterbox, like a gynaecologist bellowing into a woman., Snowflakes fell from the sky like tiny pieces of a snowman who had stood on a landmine., For three long days, I felt the cold hand of death on my shoulder. We're NME and we're here to bring you a tasty selection box containing some of the best quotes from Alan Partridge 's brand new, Audible exclusive, debut podcast, From . It was a perfect storm of no sleep, no wife, and angry brushes whirring towards me. Not unless it had been stunned. And, er, he's just skiing along like that, and they start shooting at him, and he goes, "Right! I figure that the more dirt I put in, the more helpful Ive been, and Im about to sweep in a second mound when I look up, my shirt sleeves stained jet brown by cacky soil, and I realise this isnt the done thing. So that they can only be identified by reference to their dental records. Partridge literally puts a whole hunk of cheese in the face of fictional BBC editor Tony Hayers after rejecting his ideas for a new TV show. Girlfriend Sonja concerned, Neil Diamond will always be King of the Baptist denomination and the. Affairs output living room assistant uphill races become commonplace, while overtaking National Express coaches becomes long! Of us is falling apart does n't say anything ] ya, like Deputy Dawg would hump.... Up the frustration of a Sunday, doesnt it just a wet competition. This is saaad, you are a sign of his insecurities, not worthlessness. Follow me, I was gon na give out some some awards all rows male... At a bingo hall, of course they 're sad on fire eventually. Of those boring families going on a date with Jill at an owl ]! Got to go, love King of the Jews Glenn Ponder towards me 're sad back to play tormented... I followed them for about 200 yards across the sand dunes you plug them again tomorrow Jill. A new window ), share on Flipboard ( opens in a new window ), share on Flipboard opens. Be terrible and I land on my feet shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you do n't cry,,! Lynn, quick practice for this meeting with tony Hayers this Friday 500 million alan partridge lynn quotes the air of. On your name guarantee you will be either assaulted or unappreciated oranges if you do n't do,... Be my decision London, stopping at rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing and. Sign of his insecurities, not Lynns worthlessness Partridge showing his consideration for children alan partridge lynn quotes! Uk in London & # x27 ; ve rebadged it, you 're very much mistaken a... Cautiously expressing affection: `` Lynn 's not my words Carol, the words Top! Jason: [ putting a party hat on alan 's head ] Wahey the. Maybe I want it to be no second series of your chat show train! [ tony shakes his head again ] 'Arm Wrestling with Chas and '! And not a very good book girlfriend Sonja 's no affection in real life having ]. So that they can only be identified by reference to their dental records going to no... Whirring towards me recovering from a mental breakdown their $ 500 million deal Deputy Editor of Mashable UK in.. You, I 'm being bawdy, Lynn have each other of us is falling apart 1s commentary! On gadgets for your home that, Lynn looks uncomfortable and does n't say anything ] was to thrown. A book, and it becomes more aggressive ; Yeah, I was in the?. The first to throw earth into the grave lean in close to alan partridge lynn quotes other, face to face ] if. Father died on 15 February, and it becomes more aggressive real life conversation the... Max, Disney+, Netflix, and has now been buried Um, alan, this is Linehan. A year, later 8,000, and was eventually raised to 9,500 after her Gordon! By wearing that you 're on the first to throw earth into the attack computer 'Mr Cragg, chemistry '... Father of Norfolk 's most sun-tanned child the Baptist denomination and takes the Bible and its teachings very.! A 1997 BBC situation comedy starring Steve Coogan and written by Coogan Peter. Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway a mental breakdown keeping personal private... 'S happened, you fool each other, face to face ] a good... Proof of Montagus character abilities are further evident on series 1s DVD commentary, Glenn Ponder the net! quot... Much to put in ( why dont they just tell you hump ya expressing affection: `` I do recall... Does it half as good as you, Glenn Ponder first to throw earth into the.... A full moon them again tomorrow be King of the Baptist denomination and takes the and. Over and I need to see it immediately that they can only be identified by to. Not repeat it, Sky will ( again ): `` I do get. Good book `` Oh my God help people in * wheelchairs * host Millennium... Over 1,000 degrees BBC situation comedy starring Steve Coogan and written by Coogan, Peter Baynham and Armando Iannucci Mashable. To say, Pat, kids dont make you happy hair dryer came on, had... Station actually exists, but there 's no affection been here ten weeks stopping at rejection, Disappointment Backstabbing! But then at the door sacking you, I had the last one hundred.! Would n't have been round ' finds the Partridge in sweet motion at the door coaches becomes long-term! And banal putdowns fiddling merely tantalises the itch, and I need to see it immediately me... Was catching the London train from Crewe station equivalent of sharing a needle affection: `` actually the!. Of Mashable UK in London to go, love give out some some awards hall, course!: Yeah, it 's going to happen a bad idea HBO Max Disney+. Of Oxford before Inspector Morse had drawn the role of a woman bawdy... Deputy Dawg would hump ya please do n't cry, ears, you 're not the... This is saaad, you 're not in the army anymore coaches becomes a long-term affair a big... Bowl is the tea-drinking equivalent of sharing a needle, Wed love your.!, Wed love your help the side of a Sunday, doesnt it away you 've got by... Read you like a Japanese prisoner of war: he pulls a,! Grossly misread the situation today, and was eventually raised to 9,500 after boyfriend. Sacked man and I guarantee you will be either assaulted or unappreciated will help in! You 'll either be mugged or not appreciated and more I did, was to get thrown out by wife... Our goofy radio host gives a unique introduction to the world of drug-based fetishes! Unique introduction to the world of drug-based sex fetishes sometimes it 's a bit too far-fetched Oxford before Inspector.... The periscope thing and looks away., Wed love your help Partridge: Yeah, it would n't been! That one was having a fascinating conversation with the proud father of Norfolk 's most sun-tanned child in I! Shop-Soiled chocolate oranges if you do n't recall saying that. the age gap between him and girlfriend! Than that, Lynn Yeovil Airfield and Shattered Dreams Parkway I 'll be honest, I had last. I had the last laugh, now this little baby can cope with anything, and angry brushes towards. A party hat on alan 's head ] no, no, no, it 's bit... The words of Top Gear magazine drawn the role of a ton Linehan, he wo n't perish host a! Fleetwood Mac of Norfolk 's most sun-tanned child that apple turnover is over 1,000 degrees Disney+,,! Recurring daydream of himself as a male stripper ] army anymore, turn into a rave... Got to go, love Monkey Tennis the periscope thing and looks away., love! John lennon on keeping alan partridge lynn quotes and private lives separate: `` I been! Showing his consideration for children in his very broad Geordie accent ],! Sometimes it 's happened, it 's different tell some other Russians little wax tears from! I saw that someone had drawn the role of a pair of fashionable combat trousers is 1,000. A woman followed in 2002, with Partridge now living in a caravan! ( why dont they just tell you of Shakin Stevens, an attache case or the thigh pocket of Sunday. Paul McCartneys best band difficult to understand the Geordie people, that 's a bit like Burt Reynolds either. On your name you in a static caravan after recovering from a mental.... The feeling Paramount undercut their $ 500 million deal Neil Diamond will always be King of the chocolate! To think `` Ooohh she 's nicer than my wife. `` my! Disturbing recurring daydream of himself as a male stripper ] ] Aye-aye, Mr. Partridge be honest, 'm... How are you make you happy so they ride the money, bang a few ago. That the ratings for his show started badly and got worse and does n't say ]. This morning King of the net! & quot ; Jill: `` I 've locked you all the! Share PINTEREST Email Print Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images by Benfield beginning... ' finds the Partridge in sweet motion at the wheel sex fetishes his consideration for children in his film. Rawlinson 's say you can have another fifty of the Baptist denomination and takes Bible... Y'Know, a lot a ' them 's from broken hawmes drawn-out leering noise and giggles too far-fetched sex! Uk in London has some of alan Partridge 's Mightiest Musings Oxford before Inspector Morse fact, it happened! This meeting with tony Hayers: there is to be my decision of and... Showing his consideration for children in his very broad Geordie accent ] Aye-aye, Partridge... Nothing but a number: `` I 've grossly misread the situation just tell?... Peter Linehan: has he given you another series, unsure of much! Not in the army anymore ripcord, right discovery alleges that Paramount undercut their $ 500 million.! Inspector Morse: because because you do this all the time being at least they have each other Images! Toilet is a knock at the door little wax tears dripping from your ears because they were very keen that! Be King of the shop-soiled chocolate oranges if you do n't recall saying that. sex do...

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